What is emotional resilience? Well pure and simple it is about one's ability to steer clear of taking a situation personally. What does it mean then to take something personally? Well it relates to old buried emotions being triggered by whatever is happening in the present. When triggered they can be unleashed into the person's awareness automatically and can leave them feeling overwhelmed, confused, out of control and vulnerable. The triggering stimulus sets off what I have termed "old emotional landmines" from past traumatic incidents that resemble it in some way. These traumatic memories, if not dealt with appropriately when they occur tend to become submerged and therefore unconscious. This happens largely because they are often associated with unpleasant emotions i.e. sadness, shame, helplessness, emptiness etc. which the person cannot tolerate. So, out of fear of feeling such feelings, they become "walled off" from the person's awareness and hence unconscious. This however does not mean that they go away. In fact while giving the individual the impression that they are gone they are actually lurking within, ready to "go off" with their full force and intensity whenever triggered to do so. It is my view that the reason there is an unconscious mind at all is because most individuals need to hide there their emotional landmines. The unconscious is indeed the repository of such old negative experiences. Unfortunately however a great deal of ones vital life energy is needed to keep it in place. Energy that is meant for life and living not for keeping emotional suffering at bay. It has also been my experience that many individuals fear what is stored there and that they tend to engage many addictive behaviors (i.e. drugs, alcohol, over work, sex, computer games, etc.) to try and distract themselves from ever feeling the depth of such old emotions. The belief being that by distracting one's self that one will have a greater sense of inner peace and self control. By doing so they ironically only remain vulnerable to becoming out of control whenever the next triggering emotional stimulus happens to come their way. To drive this home just imagine yourself carrying several live hand grenades in your back pocket while at the same time choosing to believe that they are not there. Is this feeling peaceful for you? Do you feel like your life is in your control? Hardly! So it is interesting when individuals find themselves continuing to avoid addressing these hidden emotional landmines. Until recently most modalities i.e. psychotherapies and the like have promulgated the idea that one needs to re-experience the past and attempt to understand it in some new way in order to defuse these landmines. It has been my experience over the last 20 years that such approaches not only do not work they also retraumatize the individuals who attempt this route, much like a hand grenade going off while you are trying to defuse it. This process is called "abreaction" by many therapists. These is now a new modality called the Mind Resonance Process(TM) (MRP) that helps one release permanently, simply and painlessly such old emotional landmines. This is all done over the telephone and allows individuals to experience a greater sense of personal resilience than they have ever known before. To learn more kindly visit the web link below. |